MARRIED AT 40-MEET SHERYL TAYLOR

Name:  Sheryl Taylor, husband - Stephen Taylor  

Age when you married:  40

Current or former profession(s):  Realtor, Treasury Sales Officer, currently - Blogger about what "Happily Ever After" looks like these days.

WHEN WE FIRST MET

How did you meet your husband?

We met on a leading and popular online dating site.  We emailed and then spoke on the phone for about three weeks before we finally met.  We both liked getting to know each other a little before we met in person.

Did you think “he may be the one” when you first met your husband? 

Yes, but I had learned from past dating not to give my heart too quickly.  Through a lot of prayer and studying lots of Christian material about being single, I had learned to value myself enough to let someone win/earn my love.  My husband won my heart quickly with his kind and honest nature.

How long did you date him before you married? 

We only dated 8 months before we decided to get married. 

Were you a little nervous about getting remarried after being single for years? If yes, how did you ease your nervousness?

I wasn't very nervous.  I had only been single for 7 years prior to meeting my husband.  We both had been married previously, and our past mistakes served as learning tools for our marriage to each other.  We both felt very calm, as if the Lord sent us to each other.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS REACTION

What was the reaction of your family and friends when you told them that you were getting married?

Our family and friends had mixed reactions.  Most of them are Christians, so they wanted to make sure we used good discernment in moving forward with a second marriage.  My husband has two daughters from his first marriage.  I don't have any children from my first marriage.  It was a huge adjustment for his daughters.

Was anyone discouraging about the institution of marriage and encourage you to reconsider? If so, how did you deal with the negativity?

Both of my husband's daughters from the previous marriage were very disheartened with the institution of marriage overall.  I think, initially they were shocked at the thought that their dad would be married to someone other than their mom.  We both tried not to pressure the girls to accept me.  Time, lots of prayer and patience paid off with both of them.  Our family and friends, in general, were supportive. As they grew to know us individually, they expressed their support even more.  

OUR WEDDING


Where did you get married?

We had a simple elopement in Savannah, GA. It included a ceremony in a historic park called Monterey Square.  The package included a bridal bouquet, a groom's boutineer, petifores, sparkling cider, and pictures.

What do you remember most about your wedding day?

 How calm we both were and how it felt like the right path to take.

WE ARE MARRIED

What misconception(s) did you have to overcome in marriage or discovered wasn’t true?

We both knew that marriage was just the start of everything.  I had the idea that because I had married the wrong person originally, the second time would not have any of the same issues that the first marriage did. I quickly learned that, although no two individuals are the same, there are many issues common to most males.  I think my husband would agree that is true for women as well. 

What do you enjoy most about married life?

When I was younger and single, I always got frustrated with people who said "if you are with the right person, it's easy".  I thought you should love someone enough to try to change for them or vice versa.  However, I finally realized what they meant when I met and married my husband.  Sure, we don't always agree, but there's no real drama between us.  It's very comfortable without being boring.  I enjoy feeling that i have a true partner.

ADVICE TO UNMARRIED SISTERS

What misconceptions do you think never-been-married singles have about marriage? 

I think that it's easy to make judgments about others and their circumstances, in general, if you've never been through that situation.  I found this to be true with motherhood.  I've gone back and apologized to some friends for judging their parenting skills before I had my daughter.  I think I was judgmental prior to my first marriage and thought I could do the marriage thing better than others.  However, I learned in a very painful way, that I did not know much about marriage.

What advice or words of wisdom do you want to share with single sisters?


Do your part by being prepared for "when" God blesses you with a marriage partner.  Self-educate yourself by reading, studying, or watching Christian information about marriage and about singleness.  Observe your married family and friends, but don't judge them.  I'm sure you've heard it, but make a list of what you want.  Include your negotiable characteristics and no negotiable characteristics.  It really helps avoid the temptation to ignore something when you meet someone.  I think women especially, think they can change undesirable characteristics in someone with a little time.  Be a whole person on your own and don't accept anyone who isn't whole also.  

Author's Note: Have you checked out my ebook  Marry Over 40 By Faith Tips? I've included questions with scripture references for self or group studies. Maybe, you just want to talk to someone, in confidence, who has walked a similar path...me. I also offer coaching and mentoring.